Category Archives: Life’s vexations

Hindi, Horace and Hanging in the Balance

In a frantic bid to find balance I bought a pair of earrings. With tiny levels swinging from each lobe perhaps I could pull myself back into alignment with the universe? It didn’t work of course,but at least it allows everyone I encounter to understand that … Continue reading

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Hansel to the rescue once again

It is lovely and quiet here, thanks for asking. Hansel came home about 10pm (sporting his new do) and I immediately forced him up a ladder to look at the beeping smoke alarm. He pinched or flipped the medallion-sized disc … Continue reading

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Emergency responders-where are you when you’re needed?

Why are none of you helping? I can’t go on much longer. I can’t go on alone. I turned off the power to the hall at the fuse box, thinking that would outwit the demonic smoke alarm. There are now … Continue reading

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Bleeping bonkers

George W.Bush and Dick Cheney did not have to resort to waterboarding.  Had they only thought to add a malfunctioning smoke alarm to the cells in Gitmo, they could have had a confession from every inmate, pronto. The smoke alarm … Continue reading

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Clearly Wrong and Perfectly Perplexing: Adverbs and the American Would-Be College Student

Adverbs are in short supply in America. One looks hard to find an “ly” at the end of any sentence. People say they will do things quick rather than quickly. My African American kids are always promising to do something … Continue reading

Posted in Crone in America, Culture with the Crone, Gangsta Hansel & Ghetto Gretel, Life's vexations | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Married Status at the Montage Hotel

Our blissful stay at the Montage Hotel Laguna Beach has been marred by only one tiny thing: the hotel’s insistence on referring to PMW as Mr. Barron. PMW loves this–not because he aspires to the title, but because he knows it annoys … Continue reading

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Trouble Breathing?

All my life I have been out of step with gym teachers and fitness instructors.  A tendency to daydream meant that at ballet class I was usually burling ( a Northern Irish term for spinning on the spot) while others were bunny-hopping. I once wandered off … Continue reading

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Not a Great Day

“You have a great day” This is how all Triple A service people end their calls and it is a mistake. It is so unlikely that anyone they are speaking to will. Take my own case: the car refused to … Continue reading

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The Key to Success

My car won’t start. The key won’t turn in the lock. Several of my new fat friends have tried it, and it really won’t move at all. It is stiffer than I was this morning after my flex and stretch … Continue reading

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Go Daddy–No Daddy

As regular readers know, I have been building a website for Hansel in a desperate attempt to help him find a regular source of income, other than me. For reasons not clear, I bought his domain name from www.godaddy.com. This … Continue reading

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