Monthly Archives: July 2009

Things you never thought you’d see in The Belfast Telegraph…

Tonight’s Belfast Telegraph provides handy tips on how making yourself over as a drag queen for tomorrow’s Pride Parade in the city centre. Tip number one for first-timers in a frock: Foundation should always match your skin tone perfectly.

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Our wee school’s a great wee school…

The Crone has flown home to the land of her birth (Boeing, not broom) to learn that her elementary school is closing after some 80 years. It seems that there are now fewer than 60 kids left at Newtownbreda Primary, … Continue reading

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Soaking Hose

The Crone has an American friend who, upon settling herself in a Soho pub on one rainy day in London, wriggled about on her bar stool and remarked to the bar man ” Ooh–wet pants”  He, of course, being British, thought she … Continue reading

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A Burly Man, the Basement and the Bathtub

The Crone enjoys few things more than a visit from a burly man, all biceps and bristle; hung about with a tool belt, flash light and army knife; and smelling of aftershave and iron nails. Today’s encounter with a burly … Continue reading

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Hair-raising accident report

Ten years ago, almost to the day, the Crone had a bad accident in her back yard. It involved a fish pond, a retaining wall, a garden candle, high heels, a broken nose, a gashed forehead, a cerebral spinal fluid … Continue reading

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Ice Cream Wars

The Crone is conflicted. For years, she and Gretel have patronized Itchy Ankle’s soft serve ice-cream parlor, conveniently located beside the laundromat and tucked just behind the car wash. Itchy Ankle’s lone entrepreneur owns all three plus a local bar. Between the washing … Continue reading

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Things disliked by the Crone

Thick milky drinks Spreadsheets Leylandii

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Itchy Ankle and Avonlea

Mention has been made here before of the Crone’s childhood love of Anne of Green Gables. And today, living in Itchy Ankle, she is often reminded of Avonlea, for the rhythm of life here is much the same. Just as … Continue reading

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LOL–and mind your eardrums

In web world, the acronym LOL stands for Laugh Out Loud. In Northern Ireland, it also stands for Loyal Orange Lodge or even Ladies Orange Lodge, the local or female chapters of the Orange Order, a Protestant fraternal organization whose … Continue reading

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Crafting with the Crone

The Crone is very excited to learn that August is craft month in Northern Ireland. Check out the new Northern Ireland Craft directory  and marvel.

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