“Where are you?” asked Gretel, sounding worried
“I am only a few minutes away. I’ll be home soon” I said
“Good” she said, “I thought you were dead”.
I couldn’t see any reason for the alarm. Granted, it had been a difficult week what with having a tire blow out on the freeway, and having mistakenly dropped my iphone in a trash can largely filled with rain water.
“What’s the drama?” I asked when I got back to the house and she had stopped hugging me.
“I came home and the door wasn’t locked and the kitchen table was all skewy and there was a hammer on it and you weren’t there” she said. “The trash can was in the middle of the kitchen floor and I was scared to look in it in case you were inside. What was I supposed to think?”
I looked around, and had to recognize that my cozy dwelling perhaps looked more like a Discovery ID reenactment set than I would like.
“You know I always forget to lock the door” I said ” and the hammer was there because I had been hanging a picture. I brought the trash can in when I had to fish out my iphone. I don’t know what happened to the kitchen table”
“You need to lock up” said Gretel reproachfully “There are crazy people out there. You know that from your murder shows. You need to stop watching those–they are not good for my nerves”.